Metropolis - When the Giving Isn't Easy

Lucille Rivin
Lucille Rivin

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We’re just departing that time of year when our thoughts are on giving. (Or are pushed there by ubiquitous marketing.) There are entreaties to give the best gifts to loved ones, and to help the neediest. Sometimes the latter occur during one's commute.

Although my husband and I regularly donate both time and money, I confess that I rarely give money to people on the train asking for what they need and explaining why the rest of us should contribute toward it. I can't really explain why.

So when I was getting a jumpstart on some work one morning on the train, and heard a monotonous voice starting to recite a familiar "Ladies & gentlemen, I'm sorry to disturb you…" I barely looked up. But then something about this man made me pay attention. From his wheelchair by the door on the opposite side of the car he unraveled his tale of super-storm-Sandy destroyed housing, roommates who found new digs but couldn't accommodate him, unemployment that only covered his monthly metro card and some food, but not rent. He told his story matter-of-factly, looking wan and unkempt but calm, resigned but not morose or pitiable. He just was.

I opened my purse to take out a dollar at the same time as the woman sitting next to me. And as I did I heard the man in the wheelchair finish his appeal saying, "I won't try to go through the car, it's too disruptive. I'll stay here and if you care to, you can bring something over."

It took a moment for that to register; I was about to reach across the car to hand my dollar to someone sitting on the other side to pass down the row to the man in the wheelchair, when the doors opened at a busy stop and a rush of passengers filled the car, standing packed in against each other.

The woman next to me and I both sat there. What was it? Unwillingness to buck the crowd? Fear of losing our seats? Whatever it was, by the time the crowd thinned enough for me to see the door, the man and his wheelchair were gone and I, sheepish, still had my dollar in my hand.

We live in such a 'me first' society. I am struck by how that attitude creeps into even our moments of generosity. Do we only give when the giving is easy?

So this is my challenge to all of us: in 2015, how can we put into action a spirit of giving all year long, even when giving includes some inconvenience for us? I'm hoping I can rise up to meet that challenge.

Let the giving begin.

 

Images courtesy of Google Images. "Kind and Generous" by Natalie Merchant. Fireworks sounds courtesy of FreeSound.org.

 

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Lucille Rivin

By Lucille Rivin

Currently Director of Curriculum and Project Development, Lucille Rivin has worked at The Leadership Program (TLP) for over 15 years. As Project Manager, Lucille oversaw the expansion of TLP’s Violence Prevention (VPP) program to comprise programs in Arts, Character Education, Advisory, and more. Under Lucille’s management VPP achieved model program status with OJJDP's MPG and SAMHSA's NREPP, national evidence-based assessors.